McCain Fires Truth Squad

September 10, 2008 · Filed Under 2008 Election, John McCain, Media, Sarah Palin, Satire 

In a move that should shake up the election, John McCain has dropped his entire Truth Squad effort.

The McCain Truth Squad and the Palin Truth Squad, which were set up by the McCain campaign to “counter false material” about the Senator and the Governor, have presented some unforeseen problems for the campaign.

“At first we thought we could just rip apart attacks made by Barack Obama and his minions,” said Senator John Warner (R-VA), one of the squad’s leaders. “But then some of the guys took the word truth literally, and honestly, it’s put a kink in the entire approach Karl Rove designed for us.”

Unbeknownst to the Squad’s leaders, some of the young idealists manning the Truth Squad’s research effort had been looking into the validity of the claims made by the McCain campaign.  They then issued press releases such as, “McCain Tax Is Not More Beneficial Than Obama’s,” “Palin Was Actually For The Bridge To Nowhere Until It Lost Support In Congress Then Spent The Money Alaska Received For The Bridge Elsewhere,” and “Most of the Claims Made By McCain Campaign Are Complete Lies Or At Best, Wild Distortions .”  

“I just thought I was doing the job they hired me for,” said 18 year old, bright-eyed McCain volunteer, Melvin Pit, in a breaking voice. “But they got royally p-o’d when I posted that I had found out that some California pit bulls actually wear lipstick.”

“We’re doing some reworking of the squads,” said Warner. “We were going to ask John and Sarah not to say anything untruthful, but it’s just easier to close them down and change the Truth Squad’s names to SQUADS.”

Developing

Steve

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Comments

One Response to “McCain Fires Truth Squad”

  1. donna on September 21st, 2008 6:23 pm

    I seem to remember early on before McCain sealed the nomination he fired many inside the campaign because it wasn’t to his liking. With his new shout out last week wanting to fire Chris Cox it sounds like he has himself confused with the Donald. I would love to see him meltdown at the first debate by screaming at Obama” you are fired you uppity bleep”. I’m sure the evil spin doctors could sell it to the base but they would have their work cut out for them.

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