Obama Signs Order Expunging Bush Administration

January 23, 2009 · Filed Under Barack Obama, Kind of Satire 

With the stroke of his pen, President Obama today purged the previous eight years of Bush Administration policies, including the previous president’s lack of intellectual curiosity.  The order, retroactively dated to the beginning George Bush’s first term, effectively annuls the events occurring under the 43rd president’s administration.

“This in no way negates the Bush administration,” said the President.  “Only the devastation it caused.” 

Some of the now rescinded incidents include 9-11, invasion of Iraq, theouting of a covert CIA agent, a slow, painful, procrastinating response to Katrina, torture, spying of the American people, opposition to the Kyoto Protocol and the collapse of the American economy.

President Obama also promised a sweeping order within the week that will reintroduce science to the Department Health and Human Services and, “if at all possible,” justice to the Justice Department.

“It actually helps our cause a great deal,” said a lawyer for those in the Bush administration who were in danger of indictment for ordering torture of prisoners at Guantanamo. “No torture, no crime. Case dismissed.”

House Republicans promised an inquiry.

“We won’t stand by and have this excessive spending place the burden of an increased populace on the already overtaxed populace,” said House whip, Eric Cantor (R, VA). “The egregious costs incurred in resurrecting the hundreds of thousands of dead who will, in effect, be alive, is just another example of liberal feel-good politics.”

In other signing news, yesterday President Obama signed a signing statement suspending the use of signing statements, which was immediately deemed illegal due to yesterday’s signing statement.

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2 Responses to “Obama Signs Order Expunging Bush Administration”

  1. PROTAGONIA on January 23rd, 2009 10:10 pm

    What a difference a day makes.

    Well done Steve.

  2. David E. Brown on January 24th, 2009 3:26 pm

    I applaud this historic action, but wonder what it does about Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, et al?

    Also, I hope it doesn’t undermine support from President Obama’s more marginal supporters who may have seen him primarily in terms of the contrast with the Bush regime. For that matter, what does this mean about the legality of the Obama Administration itself?

    Finally, does this mean that Karl Rove, Addington, Gonzalez, Cheney, etc. reenter the playing field?

    Pperhaps the most deserving individual beneficiary (among the still living, of course) is Colin Powell who must be issuing a tremendous sigh of relief that the biggest mistake of his life has evaporated.

    I fear though that this may be the ultimate test of the maxim “No good deed remains unpunished!”

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